Planning a wedding as a feminist is tough. There are plenty of wedding traditions that feel like they don’t fit (or that even make you angry!), and figuring out how to navigate the many, many choices in a way that upholds your values is challenging. Enter this this excellent series of posts from Sarah Howell-Miller! Sarah says:
I’ve always had a love-hate relationship with weddings. It’s mostly love, but there’s always a little bit of hate. I get particularly hot under the collar with certain gendered practices: the bride promising to obey the groom (I noticed he didn’t promise to obey her!); the dad giving her away like a piece of property transferring to a new owner; the couple being introduced as “Mr. and Mrs. The Groom’s Name.”
Throughout this series, Sarah explores a variety of issues you may face as you prepare to get married — challenges around body image, pressure to be happy all the time, trying to plan an inclusive wedding in a heteronormative culture, what to do about changing your name — and considers what they have to do with the patriarchy and how you can make choices in a way that reflects your own values. I highly recommend this series as a great place to start with considering how you can be a bride and still smash the patriarchy.